We had our differences only because we are so much alike, but DAMN.... I really miss him.
I think of him so many times each and every day. It can be taking a deep breath under the mane of a horse, pounding a nail, grabbing a screwdriver to tighten a hinge, reaching for pliars, hearing the gobble of a turkey across the field, admiring the beauty of a simple creek and wondering where the fish are, playing with the dogs, talking to Mom, watching a storm roll in, changing a tire, cooking up a batch of beans and weinies.... there's nothing I do that doesn't remind me of him.
I'll be working on something and grab the phone to ask him a question... then I stop cuz I don't know the number where to reach him that way. My stupid phone doesn't work anyway, so I just talk..... I just talk seemingly to myself. Is that prayer? I don't know.
I stop... I stop and feel like dropping to my knees sometimes. But he wouldn't like that. He would tell me to get my butt up off the ground or he'll give me a reason to get my butt off the ground... so I stand back up, put on a strong face and keep moving forward.
I know he's watching. I know he's there. I hear his voice. I hear his voice all the time. It's loud and clear. "Honey, I'm right here". Damn... I miss my Dad.
(singing....) I'll be right around the bend until I see you again.......
4 months ago