Saturday, May 10, 2014

We had our differences only because we are so much alike, but DAMN.... I really miss him.

I think of him so many times each and every day.  It can be taking a deep breath under the mane of a horse, pounding a nail, grabbing a screwdriver to tighten a hinge, reaching for pliars, hearing the gobble of a turkey across the field, admiring the beauty of a simple creek and wondering where the fish are, playing with the dogs, talking to Mom, watching a storm roll in, changing a tire, cooking up a batch of beans and weinies....  there's nothing I do that doesn't remind me of him.

I'll be working on something and grab the phone to ask him a question... then I stop cuz I don't know the number where to reach him that way.  My stupid phone doesn't work anyway, so I just talk.....  I just talk seemingly to myself.  Is that prayer?  I don't know.

I stop... I stop and feel like dropping to my knees sometimes.  But he wouldn't like that.  He would tell me to get my butt up off the ground or he'll give me a reason to get my butt off the ground... so I stand back up, put on a strong face and keep moving forward.

I know he's watching.  I know he's there.  I hear his voice.  I hear his voice all the time.  It's loud and clear.  "Honey, I'm right here".  Damn... I miss my Dad.

(singing....)  I'll be right around the bend until I see you again.......

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