Saturday, May 10, 2014

We had our differences only because we are so much alike, but DAMN.... I really miss him.

I think of him so many times each and every day.  It can be taking a deep breath under the mane of a horse, pounding a nail, grabbing a screwdriver to tighten a hinge, reaching for pliars, hearing the gobble of a turkey across the field, admiring the beauty of a simple creek and wondering where the fish are, playing with the dogs, talking to Mom, watching a storm roll in, changing a tire, cooking up a batch of beans and weinies....  there's nothing I do that doesn't remind me of him.

I'll be working on something and grab the phone to ask him a question... then I stop cuz I don't know the number where to reach him that way.  My stupid phone doesn't work anyway, so I just talk.....  I just talk seemingly to myself.  Is that prayer?  I don't know.

I stop... I stop and feel like dropping to my knees sometimes.  But he wouldn't like that.  He would tell me to get my butt up off the ground or he'll give me a reason to get my butt off the ground... so I stand back up, put on a strong face and keep moving forward.

I know he's watching.  I know he's there.  I hear his voice.  I hear his voice all the time.  It's loud and clear.  "Honey, I'm right here".  Damn... I miss my Dad.

(singing....)  I'll be right around the bend until I see you again.......


My house is a mess.  I look around and think "I need to do this and need to do that" but the order of things starts with "but I need to do this so I can do that and I need to do THAT before I can do that"...

....... so I dug in today.

I have a corner in my kitchen that has a bunch of random tack and horse-show stuff in tubs.  I'm sick of walking around it.  To clean that out, I had to get my tack shed in order.  So... last week, late at night (that's when I seem to get my biggest urge of motivation, much to the dismay of my daughter, Vanessa) Jay and I dug in.

Vanessa got lucky and wasn't involved in the initial CLEAN THE TACK ROOM venture.  Jay was crabbing (hee hee) but we got a lot done in a short time.  Just straightening things out, cleaning out mostly empty feed bags, sweeping and stacking/hanging properly.  I DID have to move Jay's stoooooooooopid solid-bonk-yer-head-hard-freaking rope canister.  Who hangs a "bucket 'o ropes" right in the middle of the rafters???  The bumps on my head are a wondering.

So today, I was waiting for Jay to get home to help me with some things and, as usual, he was behind schedule.  So I grabbed a big heavy tub of mystery tack and crap and headed outside (#1 step of cleaning the corner of the kitchen).

This tub had been sitting in the kitchen for quite a while.  I knew there were a set of stirrups on top of the heap, but had no idea what was underneath.  It was a tub that, apparently, my Dad had dumped things into.  I hauled it out to the shed and started going through things.

I had absconded an old dresser from a dumpster site (I'm not proud... it struck me and it wasn't garbage, so I tossed it in the back of my truck).  The dresser is now in my shed and as I began to fill the drawers, I kept digging in this tub wiping back tears and actually caught myself saying "Omg Daddy".  I never really looked in this tub before and found several brand new saddle-string packs, a bag of remnant leather straps for emergency repairs, a pliars holster thang? numerous hoof picks, several decent lead ropes that I didn't know he bought, curry combs and brushes still with the tags on them, a set of old spurs that I thought I had lost, but have been informed by a young bronc rider that they are vintage rough-stock spurs that have always been too heavy for my feet, but apparently worth something.  They will stay with me.


On to Tub #2!  I had images of someone behind me taking a picture because it was so heavy that I waddled down the hill carrying it.  I may have to try to draw myself in the image of my mind.  It took me forever with tiny dork-steps to get it to the shed.

As I began to dig through it, I found one of my snake-skin boots (have no idea where the other one is, so I only have $175 worth of the pair lmao)... gah.  I found a decent pair of leather gloves, several roping gloves, polo-wraps that needed to be washed, two brand new bottles of MTG (look out Annie's tail!), more hoof-picks, a bridle-bag, and a THOUSAND white mane-bands that I thought I had lost forever!  

Last season, I kept looking around wondering where in the H all those white bands were that I bought.  Well! I found them this year!  Unfortunately, a mouse had gotten into this tub which also contained some sample bags of horse treats and scattered the mane-bands all around in treat-crumbs and a large box of regular rubber-bands.

I got to the bottom of this and sighed.  

I could have dumped it out and bought new mane-bands, but because I am poor and frugal, I sat for an hour picking out the still-good mane-bands and put them in a fresh new sammich bag.

Annie's mane is only half white, so we should be set for a few years lmao.


I was home alone, had the pups keeping me company, and listening to the radio play everything from Stray Cat Strut to Boston.

My tack-shed is looking good.

OH! and I even installed a hitching ring to the frame so we can tie right next to it (I haven't mustered the motivation to install an actual hitching post yet) so we can either tie to the trailer and tack up OR now I have this cool tie-ring to loop a horse through right at the tack-shed door!  Not that it matters because the pones seem to like to hang out with us right there... but still.  It was a goal, and I accomplished it.  I nearly sprung my carpal-tunnel hammering, but switched hands and finished left-handed.  (that sounds bad).

ANYWAY!  I got a lot accomplished today and found some treasures in tubs I turned a blind-eye to.  I have several more that I can't wait to dig in to.

OOOOOOOOOoooooooooo! AND I found my old old roller bit that dear ole Rowdy wore 1,000 years ago!  It pays to spend some good money on a bit (granted, back in 1974 it was only about $50) because super Spike liked this bit too.  I will try it on Dewey because I think he may like it.  It's got a lot of shank, but it also flexes on the side.  It's been a good bit for me, and it's kinda purdy.  Dirty but Purdy :-)


Happy for the day.

I may need a bigger tack-shed!




Thursday, May 8, 2014


This song says it all and it was fun putting my own photos to it.